He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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