I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
