So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
