No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
There r osticjed everywhere
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
