how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
