i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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