North Korea, Best Korea!
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
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