i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
