"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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