It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
