I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
So vagazzling was a success
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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