I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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