Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
How's work?
Spinning.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
