Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
But break dance skills will only take you so far
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize