girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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