The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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