Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
