There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
