Plan B is the new Plan A
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
