...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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