Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
