I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize