He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
