I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
