The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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