What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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