I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
