i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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