Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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