I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
