Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
