How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize