i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
