I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
