my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
My pussy is not your playground.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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