that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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