Sponge bath it is.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize