return my video game
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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