I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
