just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
She even gives head with a lisp.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
