Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
