Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
