Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
