morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
