I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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