And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
