I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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