yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
