Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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