there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
