Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize