Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
